Fathers and Sons Together

A Manual for Growing your Boys the F.A.S.T. Way

Forward

Every new father should memorize the Grammy Award winner Harry Chapin’s song, Cat’s In The Cradle. For those unfamiliar or too young to recall the 1974 classic tune, put this book down and Google it, right now…

Unfortunately, when I was new to fatherhood I related far too well with the dad in Chapin’s lyrics. Young and ambitious, hungry and naive, I too framed many of my son’s first years with, “but there were planes to catch, and bills to pay” or, “not today, I got a lot to do” and, “we'll get together then, you know we'll have a good time then.” How tragic. For my two young sons and me.

Fortunately, when the boys were 7 and 10 years old I was given the opportunity to change, before they grow up and became just like me. While on a business trip half-way across the country I walked away from a car accident that could have, should have, killed me. In a blink of an eye glass shattered, airbags deployed, metal crumpled, and what flashed through my mind was not my career coming to a crushing end. I saw my sons, growing up fast, without me. A collision of car and conscience revealed my fear, “I won’t be there to raise my sons to become strong, brave, and courageous young men” My bride is the most capable woman and mom ever, yet it’s also my responsibility to teach my boys the skills and character they need to succeed. I, like the father in Chapin’s Cat’s In The Cradle, had been too busy to see that building relationships with my boys mattered more than any rising career. Thankfully it was not too late. With purpose and design we built what has become a great shared treasure in our family. We love each other. We like each other. We want to spend time together. Think about that for a moment. Teen sons and their greying father are doing life together. You know this didn’t happen on accident.

You are about to read Raising boys F.A.S.T. which is a much better way to focus on your father/son relationship than totaling a rental car far from home. What David and Tom have captured in the following pages is much more than a manual for fathers or book of coming-of-age and rites-of-passage events. The significance of F.A.S.T. is found when you see clearly the immediate and long-term value of creating quality relationships. The kind that can only be experienced as fathers and sons together.

Perhaps every new father should read Raising boys F.A.S.T., in addition to memorizing a song from the 70’s.

Jonathan Catherman

Best selling author of “Manual to Manhood”

www.JonathanCatherman.com

Endorsements

The average American father spends about 9.5 hours a day on cell phones and tech devices...and less than 8 hours A WEEK with his children. The single greatest gift we can give to our children is our presence. In Fathers and Sons Together, Tom Heck and Dave Beijer provide an outstanding practical guide to consciously building truly extraordinary lifetime relationships between fathers and sons. I had the opportunity to lead a breakthrough activity for Tom and Dave's FAST group and saw first-hand the special closeness created through the program this terrific book describes. When it's all said and done nothing will matter more in your life than the precious moments you spend with your family. Tom and Dave teach us how to seize that window of opportunity!

Brian Biro

Husband, father, grandfather, speaker, author

America's Breakthrough Coach

www.brianbiro.com

Learning to trust wisely is one of the greatest capabilities all men need to develop—and who better to learn from than our fathers in an active and meaningful way? Tom and Dave’s book will help you build strong relationships with your son and other fathers and sons that will pay dividends for the rest of your lives.

Barry Rellaford

co-author of A Slice of Trust

Contents

• How to hold your first Fathers-Only meeting
• How to organize your first Father-Son event
• How to schedule successful events
• How and why to include ceremony in your program
• How to hold awesome overnight events
• How to determine when to end your group
• Realities that will influence your group
• Suggested Father-Son events
• Template of important emails

Speaking Engagements

One or both of the authors are available for speaking engagements. These include keynotes, panels, and guests on podcasts.

About the Authors

Dave Beijer

Dave is married to the love of his life and the father of two solid young men. His training as an educator and a physical therapist has created a winding career path that began as a teacher in an upstate New York high school. He’s treated patients in multiple settings in Western North Carolina as a physical therapist for nearly 15 years and since has worked in healthcare administration. He currently serves as Executive Director of CarePartners PACE (Program of All-inclusive Care for the Elderly). Dave and his family have lived in Asheville, NC for more than 20 years.

Tom Heck

Tom is a longtime educator and when he was a high school teacher in the Washington DC area he met Anne who was also a teacher. They soon had two children and have since been enjoying (mostly) the great adventure called parenting. Tom now works as a consultant in the K12 education arena. He’s invented and licensed multiple products and written several books that help educators teach team and leadership skills to the students they serve. The resources he’s developed are used by educators and leaders around the world. Tom and his family live in Asheville, NC and he is usually found playing disc golf or playing banjo in one of the many area jam sessions. www.TomHeck.com

Contact

Tom Heck, co-author

tom@tomheck.com

Asheville, NC